A eulogy poem is a special form of prose written to offer comfort to the bereaved. Since death is a certain fact that in most cases would cause grief and bereavement to the deceased’s family, the existence and creation of eulogies is also certain. Because of this fact, eulogy poem writing has found its niche as a specialty subject available in the World Wide Web through various bereavement focused sites.

Writing eulogy poems usually do not follow a certain rigid format but a few sensible tips would be of great help. Since a death is always associated with a painful loss, funeral poems should be in an uplifting and inspirational tone. As much as the poem is written as a tribute to the deceased, it should also be considered as a reassurance to the living.

A poem attributed to Mary E. Frye entitled “Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep”, presents a poignant plea of reassurance from the departed for the living not to weep for the dead did not die but has become part of the world as fragments of light, wind and rain. This type of short poem exemplifies the theme of reassurance to the living that death is not the cessation of life but a continuation.

“An Irish Funeral Prayer,” derived from a sermon delivered in 1910 by Henry Scott Holland during the funeral of King Edward VII at Westminster, has been used for years in Irish and Christian funeral services. In the same tone as the poem by Frye, this poem also speaks of reassurance when part of it says “I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner”. A way of saying that there lies a promise of a reunion of the dead and the living in another place and another time.

Free resources and free sample eulogy poems abound on the World Wide Web which can be used as inspiration or as templates for your very own. A poem because it comes from the heart, is a fitting tribute to the dead and the living to be remembered in time. Eulogy poems have a global message that crosses cultural boundaries. A poem you write for someone you know of might just bring the same reassuring message to other families who suffer through death. If you are gifted with the blessing and talent of writing poetry for the dead, share it.

Funerals and the many customs associated with marking the passing of a loved one allow people to express sadness over their loss. During times of grief and change, people often turn to different forms of art to help them heal and to express their pain. Usually, a close friend or family member is asked to deliver a memorial speech, also called a eulogy to honor the deceased. Today, a eulogy can take the form of a speech, a letter and even a poem. Writing a funeral poem as part of a eulogy, to display at the visitation or for your own comfort allows you to use the art of language to convey what you’re feeling.

Writing a funeral poem If you choose to write a funeral poem, decide first who the poem will be shared with. Will the poem be for your own personal use or will it be for a group of people sharing the loss of a loved one? If the poem is a private expression to help you address your own feelings, you can be more liberal in what you write. Private verses allow you to be completely open about how the deceased’s passing makes you feel. This personal type of poetry allows you to write about more intimate or private memories that you may not be comfortable sharing with others. Don’t feel that you have to write what others want to hear – just be honest in your writing and people will appreciate your thoughts and words. If you’ve decided to share your poem with others, be sure to consider the thoughts and feelings of others as you write.

Gathering your thoughts After you’ve decided the purpose and audience of your poem, take some quiet time to let your thoughts flow. Think about the memories you have of your friend or family member – your fondest times spent together, their personality, passions and life achievements. Don’t feel hampered by rhyme structures or worry about your writing skills – simply let the word come; a funeral poem that takes the form of a verse, a letter or a speech is perfectly suitable. Delivering a funeral poem Usually, a funeral poem is read during the funeral service. If you choose to deliver your poem during the service, bring a copy of the poem to read from. Trying to memorize touching words while you’re coping with a host of emotions is very difficult. It can be even harder to remember the words if your voice falters or if you’re uncomfortable speaking in front of a group. Be sure to write legibly in large type and take some time to review the poem carefully several times.

You may prefer not to read your poem aloud, but still share it with others. Consider writing out the poem and displaying it in a frame at the visitation. Many funeral homes offer memorial pamphlets to mourners. Heartfelt words can be a touching addition to any funeral program or pamphlet and are often kept as mementos.

If you’ve chosen to write a funeral poem just for yourself you can preserve the poem in a frame on its own or behind a picture. Some families choose to place a memorial announcement in their local newspaper a year after the loved one’s passing. This is another option if you feel more comfortable sharing your writing after some time has passed.

Inspiration If you’re not sure where to begin, we suggest reading a few of the classic poems below. Some of these poems are about loss and grieving and others are about honoring life. They can be used as inspiration, or can be read at the funeral if you’re having difficulty putting your own thoughts into words.

* Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep – Mary Frye
* All is Well – Henry Scott Holland
* Death, Be Not Proud – John Donne
* The Tide Rises, The Tide Falls – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
* The Oak – Alfred Lord Tennyson
* No Coward Soul is Mine – Emily Bronte
* Remember – Christina Rossetti
* A Parable of Immortality – Henry Van Dyke

Funeral poems are a very personal expression of your loss. While they can be touching and comforting for others to hear, thoughts and emotions can also be difficult to capture on paper. Talk to other people who were close to the departed if you need inspiration for your poem – this will help inspire you and allow you to share your memories with others.
Gwendolyn Ladd is a writer for the online funeral planning resource funeralplanning101.com. Her grandmother’s recent passing has given Gwen insight into the various responsibilities associated with funeral planning.